A review of today's news

THE FUCKING WORLD IS ON THE BRINK OF THE EDGE OF ENDING.

OH MY GOODNESS! ONLY AL GORE AND BARACK OBAMA CAN SAVE US NOW?
NO MAYBE JESUS WILL STILL DO IT!


Yeah, that about sums it up. Oh, and, in unrelated news news, Somali "pirates" have "surpressed" a "revolt" on the Ukranian boat they've... "pirated". Well, now, where's the DEFCON 5 level retaliation from... um... anybody?

Anyway. The news today: WE'RE ALL VERY FUCKED. THANKS.

Ozy was right, you know. They try to create panic and fear to drive up sales of crap we don't need, so that not only will we feel better about the fear they've put in us, but they can make shit-loads of moolah. But, if you haven't noticed, nobody is buying a fucking thing. Because we're all being fired from our jobs, so that the company you used to work for, can save money.

My suggestion to you, loyal reader, is to get a job as blogger. You will be taken semi-seriously and don't have to ever leave your bedroom/apartment/parent's basement. Nor will you ever have to actually wash. Because, you know, you're connected, and need to stay connected, in order to feed your readership the vital news they need, RIGHT NOW.

Case-in-point.