Posts
Gossip Girl - What is this facile shit? Not only do none of the leading men have any charisma, but I don't want to have to watch a show that has no bangable leading ladies. Am I to believe that the - actually fairly dull - lives of some rich, obnoxious children is "entertainment"? Well, I guess if you're American, waving around shit on a stick is entertainment. Also, do you really think that some gossip-whore has a network of spies that can be everywhere and anywhere, always there for the moment of gossip making history? Bollocks. This nonsense too easily passes the intelligence detector of the American audience.
Stargate (any) - Holy Jesus on a bike. Why has this rotten dick of a show managed to spawn more entries in shitty sci-fi than I have had hot meals? Is it because I'm anorexic? Porbably. But, come on, even homeless people shouldn't be subject to the continued mis-adventures of some assholes who go through a water hole thing. By the way - Stargate, the world's greatest metaphor for anal sex.
America's Next Top Model - Currently, my girlfriend and I are half-heartedly watching series 11. ELEVEN. That means that there have been 10 previous top models. Now, I could give a fuck for the fashion world, but, what in the balls happened to those 10 (TEN!) previous "top" models? I don't remember them ever making it past my TVBOX. I'm sorry, is winning a competition held by the worst model, Tyra Banks, not incentive enough for you to "make it"? Y'know, fuck reviewing this shit. Also, the models are pig-fugly.
Dr. Who - Why the hell is any self-respecting sci-fi fan watching this? Because there's no such thing as a self-respecting sci-fi fan, that's why! You greasy, useless bits of floating turd have made the moronic, banal adventures of a thin twat popular. God damn, fuck this show. Go watch Battlestar Galactica instead.
Whilst there is plenty of other crappy tv pilling up inside my tvbox, quicker than the sand filling my lungs, these are the only shows I could be bothered to waste my time writing about. I have a vagina to plunder and wine to drink and babies to torture. I'm sure there's plenty of crap you're watching, too.
Fuck you very much.
